this was so beautifully written and i agree so much. for someone to really love you, it feels as if you have to show them all the “appropriate” lovable parts, but you also want them to know the real you, a true contradiction, but i really enjoyed your perspective.
I just wanted to say that I loved this post. it brings me comfort to know that other people are just as introspective as I am. I have the same feeling of fear about showing my true authenticity because I feel like I have to water myself down to find someone that will love me. Thank you for making me feel less alone! :)
never ever water yourself down love, although we question which path we should take, easy love is so much more worth it than forced love. your feelings and your true self are so beautiful! : )
I love your writing! You articulate this so so well. I feel like I’ve written something similar in my recent post. We actually have pretty similar writing styles 🤗 thank you for sharing!
i am so glad you exist and i know you will find love in the right places that fulfills you and pours into your bowl rather than take too much. love in every form 💌
When Perceval was searching for the grail for over 20 years and only having a glimpse of it. He went to a hermit. And when they sat for a meal the hermit said let’s pray. And Perceval was so distraught about his life he said to the hermit that he hates god. The hermit said in reply that it’s crazy to hate god for if you hate god you hate yourself. After this realization Perceval never had problem finding the grail. For it was always done the road to the left and across the draw bridge.
As someone who has been loved that intensely by others meanwhile I have only felt it towards one, in order to be truly loved you have to be unapologetically yourself. You must be confident in the choises you make, not only confident but you must know yourself just as much. I've always rolled my eyes when someone said "you must love yourself before someone else can love you back" but in a deeper sense it really is true. You have to give in, not just to another person but to the enitre world around you, without a single doubt, in order to be truly appreciated and loved like that. People say they fall in love with mystery, except its the act of uncovering that mystery, that's the true act of love, in my opinion. You are uniquely yours and you do not need to be written in books about or seen to flourish, women are flowers who do not need water to bloom, so be your own source of light.
to add: you don't need to convince somebody that you are loveable if the love is shining from within you, not just a love for yourself and who you are but the world around you as well
I feel this on a deep level and am also navigating this yearning to be yearned for.
I think some reframes could be helpful. We don’t really sacrifice anything when being authentically ourselves other than a perception of safety in belonging to whatever group we are a part of. What’s interesting is that if we are rejecting for being ourselves, we were never truly part of that group to begin with.
You mentioned you are able to see and appreciate people for who they really are. I would challenge that and ask if it’s really true. The reason is I’ve found in my own experience and observations, when we don’t feel like we are receiving healthy love it’s often because we aren’t truly giving it. For example, we don’t want others to judge us. But upon introspection we realize that in small ways (or large) we’ve been judgmental towards others and ourselves. Why can’t people find me attractive or look beyond my physical attraction? Meanwhile I’m only interacting with people I find physically attractive.
The way we undermine our own desires with unconscious behavior can be surprising.
Living authentically, with all our quirks and flaws, while also trying to heal and better ourselves by being introspective and taking action can be a fine line to tread. But to live otherwise would be to live in ignorance.
It’s a difficult journey, but I have to believe we are doing the right thing for ourselves and the world by traveling it.
The thing is, the fact that this posts exists,the fact that there are people who think like this is enough. The fact that I am capable of yearning for someone and you are capable of yearning for someone is proof enough that we can both be wanted the same way. It’s hope. It’s hope that somewhere out there it exists. And I don’t know about you all, but that’s enough for me. Maybe that’s sad. But it’s enough for me.
this was so beautifully written and i agree so much. for someone to really love you, it feels as if you have to show them all the “appropriate” lovable parts, but you also want them to know the real you, a true contradiction, but i really enjoyed your perspective.
im so happy my writing resonating with you, it truly makes my heart so happy, its nice to know that I'm not alone with these feelings :)
I just wanted to say that I loved this post. it brings me comfort to know that other people are just as introspective as I am. I have the same feeling of fear about showing my true authenticity because I feel like I have to water myself down to find someone that will love me. Thank you for making me feel less alone! :)
never ever water yourself down love, although we question which path we should take, easy love is so much more worth it than forced love. your feelings and your true self are so beautiful! : )
….and necessary twast from the water!!!?
I love your writing! You articulate this so so well. I feel like I’ve written something similar in my recent post. We actually have pretty similar writing styles 🤗 thank you for sharing!
ahhh great minds think alike hahaha, will definitely give your stuff a read, thank u so much! : )
i am so glad you exist and i know you will find love in the right places that fulfills you and pours into your bowl rather than take too much. love in every form 💌
you're so kind, and i wish you the same tenfold! : )
When Perceval was searching for the grail for over 20 years and only having a glimpse of it. He went to a hermit. And when they sat for a meal the hermit said let’s pray. And Perceval was so distraught about his life he said to the hermit that he hates god. The hermit said in reply that it’s crazy to hate god for if you hate god you hate yourself. After this realization Perceval never had problem finding the grail. For it was always done the road to the left and across the draw bridge.
I forgot to add that god is a reflection of one’s self.
every. single. word. i could connect with. I love this!
it makes my heart so happy that you could connect, that what i most want from my simple writing, thank u for the support : )
As someone who has been loved that intensely by others meanwhile I have only felt it towards one, in order to be truly loved you have to be unapologetically yourself. You must be confident in the choises you make, not only confident but you must know yourself just as much. I've always rolled my eyes when someone said "you must love yourself before someone else can love you back" but in a deeper sense it really is true. You have to give in, not just to another person but to the enitre world around you, without a single doubt, in order to be truly appreciated and loved like that. People say they fall in love with mystery, except its the act of uncovering that mystery, that's the true act of love, in my opinion. You are uniquely yours and you do not need to be written in books about or seen to flourish, women are flowers who do not need water to bloom, so be your own source of light.
to add: you don't need to convince somebody that you are loveable if the love is shining from within you, not just a love for yourself and who you are but the world around you as well
This was so soft and wonderful. Coincidentally, going through these feelings too.
thank u so much for your kind words, i hope that you find comfort in knowing that you're not going through these feelings alone. <3
I can relate so much to this. Put all my thoughts into words
I'm so happy my simple words could speak to you in this way! sending lots of love : )
I feel this on a deep level and am also navigating this yearning to be yearned for.
I think some reframes could be helpful. We don’t really sacrifice anything when being authentically ourselves other than a perception of safety in belonging to whatever group we are a part of. What’s interesting is that if we are rejecting for being ourselves, we were never truly part of that group to begin with.
You mentioned you are able to see and appreciate people for who they really are. I would challenge that and ask if it’s really true. The reason is I’ve found in my own experience and observations, when we don’t feel like we are receiving healthy love it’s often because we aren’t truly giving it. For example, we don’t want others to judge us. But upon introspection we realize that in small ways (or large) we’ve been judgmental towards others and ourselves. Why can’t people find me attractive or look beyond my physical attraction? Meanwhile I’m only interacting with people I find physically attractive.
The way we undermine our own desires with unconscious behavior can be surprising.
Living authentically, with all our quirks and flaws, while also trying to heal and better ourselves by being introspective and taking action can be a fine line to tread. But to live otherwise would be to live in ignorance.
It’s a difficult journey, but I have to believe we are doing the right thing for ourselves and the world by traveling it.
Girl the wayyy you put my thoughts into words ❤️
hehe love you girlll! <3
This is beautiful!!
thank you so much, love!
you forgot to hold my hand...
so beautiful
Beautifully written. I hope you find all the love you want, without longing for it and get the reciprocation of what you give.
thank you so much, i love the same to you as well : )
thank you for your words my friend
The thing is, the fact that this posts exists,the fact that there are people who think like this is enough. The fact that I am capable of yearning for someone and you are capable of yearning for someone is proof enough that we can both be wanted the same way. It’s hope. It’s hope that somewhere out there it exists. And I don’t know about you all, but that’s enough for me. Maybe that’s sad. But it’s enough for me.